A Reason or a Season

Friends.

You never know what will happen next. You go along living your life, when you realize the fact that you are not happy. After 62 years, I felt I should be happy. So I went about searching for happiness to see where it was hiding.

I looked around my house and my possessions. Looking at my photo albums, I felt really happy. Chalk one up for happy memories. But, it was not complete. I spent hours looking at the pictures and remembering when and where each one was taken. Looked at the smiles on the kids faces when they were toboganning in the gully beside our house. Looked at the smiles again when opening presents at Christmas and birthdays. Looked at smiles again when playing with the animals on the farm. Loved their excited faces when building the dam in the creek to make a pond to play in. (Don't worry, it was a very small dam!)

So, I thought happiness comes with family around you. Then, I put away the albums and felt happiness slipping again. The answer was not complete. My children are grown. They live their own lives now. I see them often, but not to watch them play any longer. I watch my grandchildren play and that sometimes overwhelms me with happiness. But, there are the times in between visits.

So, I looked around my house again. It is a very old house with lots of problems. We are repairing one problem at a time, turning it into a better house. Somehow, that does not bring true happiness, it brings contentment. I know things will be getting better in the house. It will be improved when all is done. Once again, something is missing.

My spoon collection covers all the wall space in my dining room. I have collected over 600 spoons as souvenirs of places around the world. The first spoons are of places I have been, then it branched to antique spoons, places my children have traveled, places my other family members have traveled, places I have never seen. I felt happy polishing all of them and thinking about all the places in the world represented by this large collection. Something was still missing. I just could not figure it out. Mostly I felt happy, but I also felt a hole in my heart. I could not figure out what it needed.

That is when I started to look inside myself. My friend GE kept sending these beautiful pieces of music and pictures of beautiful places. We went for imaginary walks on Skype. Each time we did something like that I felt very happy. My friend JW became a wayshower for me. He helped me realize that friends are an important part of anyone's life. We need to treasure every moment we spend with them. My friend DS left the earth suddenly and I still miss her very very much even though it has been a few years now. Another friend, AI, was persistent enough to keep in touch even through my depression period when I spoke to no one and felt that I had no reason to go on. PT is still keeping in touch with me although the business we were in together is no longer my focus.

Friends, Family, Possessions, do they make you happy? No. But what you feel and think about them sure does. Happiness is what you make it. You, Yourself must make your happiness. I have discovered that for me it is true friendships, happy times with family, and memories that keep me feeling happy. I have also discovered that dwelling on negative happenings makes me very unhappy. I am learning not to dwell on the negatives with my friends.

Some friends I have had for many years, many seasons. A few great friends I have had for only a short time. All of them have a part to play in my life. I can go to them for comfort, excitement, knowledge, spirituality, and even just a place to vent so I don't hold in my anger too long. I am healthier for having friends. I am happier for having friends. I treasure every moment of my life because I have friends to share them with.

So where do I find these special people? Finding each one of them has been different. There is no one way to find friends. The most important thing I had to learn was to smile. One very special friend I found just by clicking on his name in a skype chat room. I don't know why I did that. I introduced myself and within a very short time. It felt as though we had been connected for many years. Others I met also through skype chats, group chats with people who have similar interests. I met a few through facebook,and other social media sites. Another special friend came from a chance meeting in a bookstore. He looked friendly and exuded self confidence the way I wanted to do . I introduced myself and we have been in business together since. We hae also become good friends in other aspects too.

Follow your gut instincts. They will lead you to many fruitful relationships. They will also warn if the situation or relationship is not a good one. And always, always, be happy.

Coach Elouise

Making Money

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